Disclaimer: This post is about weight. If you find this topic triggering or if it makes you feel uncomfortable, be responsible for yourself and don’t read it.
You guys are just unbelievably awesome. I always feel better when I pour my heart out here. I know everyone can’t relate to this but for those of you who can, I am so incredibly appreciate of your encouraging words and support.
If you missed Part 1, read it here.
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I’m ready to make a change.
…to get rid of the small amount of weight that I’ve been hanging onto.
…to teach myself the correct amount of food that I should be eating.
…to hold myself accountable for the over-indulgences.
…without guilt from what I eat.
…without restriction from what I love to eat.
…without crazy obsession over every morsel I eat.
I have a plan.
But I’m almost scared to say it. Actually, I’m very scared to say it. Not because 99.9% of my readers have ever been anything but nice to me, but because this is something that gets mixed reviews in our little part of the universe.
I am going to count calories.
A lot of thought has gone into this. I’ve considered other approaches. I’ve weighed my options. But no other choice seems so logical, for me. I’ve shunned counting calories for years for myself because of the way I used calorie counting in the past to deprive myself of food, socializing, and happiness. I used calories as a control mechanism because sometimes I felt like my life was spinning out of control. Since coming back from that long journey in calorie restriction, I’ve made it a point to never go down that road again.
But things have changed.
When I look around, I see a very different picture of myself and my life.
- I’m not completely unhappy with my body and my size.
- I’m not unhappy with my life.
- I’m not trying to find some obscure way to control a part of my life.
- I am appreciative of the body I have and what it can do.
- I am mindful that eating enough is vital to accomplishing the goals I have set for myself.
- I understand and value nutrition so much more.
- I am set on having a sensible plan and sticking to it, not restricting more than the plan calls for like I have in the past.
- I am in a healthier place. I have unconditional love in my life and know that whether I way five pounds less or twenty pounds more, that will not change the amount of love in my life.
Ultimately, I see this as a way to get rid of some bad habits, better understand the quantity of food I need, and find ways to enjoy what I love but fit it into a healthy lifestyle. Rather than mentally berate myself for eating a piece of cake or say “what the hell” and have another slice, I plan to find ways to eat what I want and balance it out with healthy choices. Rather than punish myself for “bad behavior”, I plan to be kind to myself and my body by using calorie mindfulness to make the best choices for my health.
You say I should eat more because I ran 10 miles today? How much more? Like two pieces of cake more or a sensible snack more?
I like numbers. They make sense to me. I’m a very tactile and kinesthetic person. I need to see things. They need to be real to me. Numbers are real. I can picture them and how they fit into my world.
In my head these things need to be defined or else I end up gaining five pounds while training for a marathon. I know everyone cannot relate to this and that’s okay. This is me. This is my small problem. And this is how I plan to address it.
A brief summary of what my plan looks like:
- I’m using an online calorie counter.
- I’m using a program that takes into account how active I am. Not one of those “Are you sedentary or lightly active?” types, but one that actually lets me input the number of miles I have ran that day and encourages me to eat more because of those miles. <–This is something that was definitely missing from my past calorie counting attempts.
- I plan to try to eat the amount of calories that is recommended to me but will eat more if I am hungry realizing that it will probably balance out the next day.
- The calorie counter will be a guide, but not my bible.
My goals:
- To use calories to help guide my decision making so I choose more plant based foods over processed foods.
- To use calorie counting as guidance of how much more I should be eating on days where I am more active than usual.
- To use calorie counting to help me make better choices during the weekend which is when I usually overindulge.
- To get more familiar with the quantity of food I should be eating for my body size, rather than going bite for bite with people who are much taller than me.
- To get to a weight where my clothes fit well and I feel comfortable (my happy weight), slowly and surely, that I can maintain without mental stress.
I am not thinking of this as a diet. Oh no. Because diets are short term. They are temporary strategies to get weight off as fast as possible. While I am using a strategy that will be temporary, I hope this will be a life-long learning lesson in meeting my body’s caloric needs in a logical way.
I hope I’ve explained my goals and thought process in a way that makes sense. We all have different paths and I’m choosing this path for me at this moment in time. While I hope to learn a lot from it, in no way am I tied to it. Ultimately, I’ll do what’s best for me, which might mean completely disregarding this if it proves to be too much. If I stick to my goals for both physical and mental health, I believe I’ll be successful.
If you have any questions, I am more than happy to answer them.
I think what you are doing makes sense. I was a weight watchers fan for YEARS! I used it periodically as I gained weight. Then I turned to whole foods but started to slowly gain weight. I realized I was eating too much of it. So I started counting calories but still eat the whole foods only to understand what was the “right” portions for my body. It worked great for me! And I feel great…..
I’m so glad you said that. I feel exactly the same way. I’ve heard so many people say that when you eat whole foods, you can’t overeat, and then feel ashamed because I do. Glad to know I’m not the only one who struggles with this and SO glad to know you’ve found success.
I actually think that counting calories from time to time can be a great way to either get back on track or make sure that we are still on track. I do it sometimes, and I love using Livestrong.com’s MyPlate feature. It is an amazing tool, so if you’ve never tried it, I highly recommend it!
You can also track your workouts.
I’m using Calorie King because I found it really easy to use and it let me weight my exercise against my calories so I can eat more on the days where I’m more active, which is so important on my long run days. Thanks for the support and the encouragement, Erin.
Good luck with your plan! I have been counting calories for about a year now (thanks to MyFitnessPal) or a bit more and I have really liked the results. Much like you said I don’t use it as a diet but rather as a guide to learn about my body and my energy needs. It has also taught me balance in terms of going out and socializing and eating out without going overboard or at least making sure I am honest with myself about it and trying to make up for it in small ways over the next few days. I sincerely hope it works for you the way it has worked for me. =D What online calorie counter are you using?
Thanks so much for the well wishes! I’m using Calorie King. After trying out quite a few just to test them, I think it’s the easiest to use.
May I ask which site you’re using? I’ve been doing Weight Watchers since January (down 59 pounds so far!), but I’m thinking of switching to calorie counting now that I’m working out harder and running and the weight is coming off at a slower rate. I’d love to find one that factors in my workouts and runs!
I’m using Calorie King. I tried out quite a few but think it is the easiest to use. It’s not free but they have a 7 day trial.
I don’t think of it as “counting calories,” but rather managing my food intake. It helps keep me honest and makes me think twice about whether I’m actually really truly hungry. I’ve been using CalorieKing.com for the last three years and it’s definitely helped me keep my weight in check.
Your plan sounds perfectly logical to me. It sounds quite like my own.
Thanks for the encouragement.
The online food log at CalorieKing is awesome by the way.
The community there is also really warm and welcoming!
I think this is great. I wish you the best of luck:)
Thank you so much Danielle!
I think your reasons for wanting to count calories make total sense and are healthy, which is the most important thing to remember. Good luck! We’re all here to support you!
Thank you so much Jessica! That really means a lot to me.
Foodie Fresh—DON’T DO IT. I read your blog EVERY DAY. I love your recipes! I have serious food issues–there I said it. I admitted it. DON”T DO IT. I currently weigh 125 and am 5’11. I am partially trying to recover. I am a numbers person. I like black and white. I like you so I am saying this—cut portions—do anything, but don’t count–It will rule/ruin your life. (I hope you still like me)E
Thanks so much for your input Elizabeth. I realize that calorie counting is not for everyone and I might find that it’s not for me too. It’s just something I’m trying out right now. And please know that I’ve considered all of the negative sides of calorie counting and feel like I’m mentally healthy enough to deal with it right now. Brad wouldn’t think twice to tell me if he thinks I’ve gone off the deep end so I know he’ll keep me in check as well. It makes me really happy that you feel comfortable enough to share your own ideas here. Thank you for sharing that you’re trying to recover and I’ll try to be sensitive to that when I post.
I think that calorie counting can be a great tool for those who choose to use it – props to you for sharing your plan even though calorie counting isn’t right for everyone. Good luck with everything!
I think this makes a lot of sense. I think once you find out about how much food you need calorie wise you won’t need to count calories anymore! And I think if you aren’t super strict about calories it will not take over your life.
Thanks for sharing this. I know I don’t mention weight on my blog because I don’t want others to judge whether or not I should lose weight. I want to find my “happy weight” free from the opinions of others.
Thanks so much Alyssa. That is what I hope to do too — use calories as a way to gauge how much I should be eating but not counting as a way of life. I totally understand about not sharing it with others. We all have to do what’s right for us and I hope you figure that out for yourself.
I’m curious to see how this goes for you, I’ve always wondered how counting calories works/how feasible it is to maintain. That’s always been the turn off for me.
Though it’s nice to think eating whole foods means you won’t overeat, we know that’s not true — I know I overeat sometimes. I too am trying to get back to my happy weight, which I define very similarly to how you do. I just don’t know how to get there, & the last thing I want to do is gain weight as I train for the marathon (for goodness sakes I’m running so much, why am I not losing weight?!). Sigh. I hate that we think about this so much as women.
I’m not sure how to share about this because I don’t want to post calorie specifics, but hopefully I’ll figure out some way to share in a way that is helpful for readers. Any ideas you have are welcome!
kelly – i think it can be eye opening to calorie count. it seems that you’re going into it with the right mindset. i tracked my calorie intake for about a week this summer just to get an idea of my daily eats and to make sure that i was fueling my body properly for the amount of activity i was doing.
good luck and i hope this ends up being the solution that you’ve been looking for.
Thanks so much Jen!
I think that calorie counting can be an effective means to weight loss and, like weighing yourself, tends to get a bad rap. (Is it rap or rep?)
It’s rap, but rep fits too. I think it’s different for everyone, so I’m trying to figure out what works for me.
I’m excited for you. Great sensible plan. Looking forward to seeing your fantastic results. I am tuning in!
Thanks Sierra! It’s quite a struggle for me so I don’t know how fast it will happen or how I will choose to share it. But thank you for the encouragement.
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